The heavy darkness and the ‘ball and chain’ attached to your ankle makes you drag your feet as you step closer and closer. Palms get sweater, breathing becomes shallow, your heart beat may speed up, muscles and ‘knees’ weaken and diarrhoea beckons. You are suffering from FEAR.
We are suffer from fear. May it be fear of rejection, fear of criticism, fear of animals or heights! What are your fears? Do you agree that fears hold you back?
I find fear quite fascinating in that it makes such a massive impact to one’s body system, it’s as if fear is a virus to your body, destroying it from the inside and holding you back from achieving many things in life. Your body is operating in different levels when you are in FEAR mode and the typical response is whether your ‘Fight or Flight’, this means you either fight your way through the fear of potential harm or you take flight and get the hell away from this potential harm. I also like to call this concept as FIGHTER MODE VS SURVIVAL MODE.
[Please note that this article is tailored towards personal and business development however the concepts explained here can be applied to bungee jumping, holding spiders and flying on planes.]
I remember when I was a young kid my family dog Lucky had ran away usually pursuing another dog or some fun. He’d usually return after 1-2 days and we’d all breathe a sigh of relief. But not this time. He hadn’t returned for several days now and we were fearing the worse. Dad organised a search party and door knocking. I remember I sabotaged Dad’s search tactics for me which was to go door knocking the whole block. I found some bullshit excuse to not go (it’s been so long ago, I can’t remember how I sabotaged it!), simply because I was scared, I was fearful. My Dad didn’t know that I hadn’t done what he had set out and I remember it was on a Tuesday that he had discovered I hadn’t gone door knocking and he looked me in the eye and called me a ‘coward’. He shook his head and walked away. He was disgusted. Well, that’s how I played it out on my mind.
I was a coward! How much did Lucky mean to me? He was lost. He could’ve been run over by a car or worse! He was family and because of my apparent Fear of Rejection, I was allowing ‘family’ to be in danger. So it spurred me on to face my fears and go door knocking. I was fuelled by the need to find Lucky and of course the sheer disappointment and the words ‘coward’ spoken by Dad.
This event changed my life. It really did. I’m not some coward bitch. I choose FIGHT all the time. I choose to FIGHT to survive not RUN to survive.
From this understanding, my nervous system’s ability to go straight to FIGHT mode has helped me to dominate such activities as :
- conducting cold calls
- go door knocking
- selling vouchers, coupons and products to businesses
- meet new people – networking
- listen and absorb criticism
- do public speaking
FEAR IS THE PRODUCT YOUR THOUGHTS SOLD YOURSELF
Fear is subjective, it’s your perception and your own thoughts that develops fear. Your thoughts of whatever situation you’re in kick-starts your fight or flight response which means you’re already in FEAR mode. Stop manufacturing bullshit ideas about a situation, a task or an event. These thoughts are killing your growth in life and the amazing potential success you can have, if only you can conquer your fears.
You made this. You build a door that stops you from achieving success. Could your success be making more money by asking for a promotion or raise from your manager? Could your success be that you closed a $10,000 deal by making a cold call? Could your success be that you’ve lost weight, got fit and competed in bodybuilding competitions?
Just imagine for one tick that you were able to smash through that ‘door’ of fear and embrace that challenge and achieving success! How good does that feel? Isn’t it worth embracing the fighter response and continue to pursue success? You see how much your mind plays on your mind and completely wrecks it by applying fear?
You must understand your fear. Do you fear rejection, criticism, terrorism, death, loss of loved ones, failure or your health? Fear shouldn’t be so negative, I’d rather see fear as a trigger or a reason to dominate your life. You see, if you fear rejection and you choose to confront it by making that cold call or doing effective canvassing then you’ve already won, you’ve dominated your fears. The sale is a bonus!
5 STEPS TO DOMINATING FEARS
- Write down your dream goal and describe how you’d feel achieving this
- Write down a strategic plan to achieving your goals. Remember you must chunk them down to smaller tasks which also overcomes your fears. (need help planning your goals? [ CLICK HERE for my FREE goal planner : http://bit.ly/2mcoyFt ]
- Describe what you’re fearing
- Identify what exactly you’re afraid of
- How did you generate this?
- Film or record yourself declaring your fear(s) and how you came about it
- Film or record yourself how silly your fear is and how it is holding you back from great success. Repeat loudly, ‘Fears are all in my head. I’m the boss NOT my fears’
- Film or record yourself speaking about being grateful for your life, family, skills, opportunities etc..
- Make sure you are in FIGHTER MODE and pumped for change, hell even do 20 push-ups or 5 minutes of shadow boxing – just to massive increase your adrenaline (a hormone very useful for ‘pumping you up’!)
- Apply your strategic plan and goals immediately
- Facilitate your recent confrontations with your fears by backing it up with actions you wrote down on your plan.
Stop leaving in fear. Embrace your fear and let it drive you to success.
DOMINATE YOUR FEARS
P.S.: I would love to discuss your fears and help you overcome them. Please fill the box below and I’ll be in touch =).